My dear, sweet boy. #1

March 20, 2013 § Leave a comment

This morning, a crisp, blue-sky autumn morning, I sat in my car at school. Watching.

My biggest boy, William, hangs around in the bus shelter near the car park with his friends as they arrive for the day. As I saw him laugh, flick his side fringe and duck his head in the way that he does, I was suddenly rocked by a wave of wonder.

How did my first baby suddenly grow up and become this amazing young man? It is such a cliche but time really does go fast, and childhood ends all too soon.

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However I am nostalgic, not sad, for the childhood that was William’s. He was old enough to share in our adventures, and I can see subtle ways in which they have shaped him. I’ve always strived to treat my children as equals, as much as possible. I love seeing in William the belief that his opinions are valued, the confidence he knows within himself. Not so much though the times when he is adamant he knows better than his parents (however in regards to his own life, he is often the expert)!

I have always thought that motherhood is mostly a string of experiences prompting us to let go. Now that he is almost fourteen and wanting a little more independence and freedom, it is crunch time.

So far I have been impressed. He packs good clothes to wear for a family dinner without being asked. When I am out with five children and no other adult, he shepherds the young ones along and looks out for them, even reasons (bribes!) them into co-operation. And the one that touches my heart the deepest…. the pleases and thank yous I am getting these days if I make him a snack or do something else a bit special, just for him; and the gruff ‘love you’ I get as he goes to bed.

How did it all happen? Did I have a hand in that? Did I help create this self-knowing young man?

I can’t wait to see who he is growing into.

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