And a Big week of Beginnings…
February 7, 2013 § Leave a comment
This week saw three of my children return to school full time. Lily, who is five, began Big Kindy with Lillia, the teacher who both William and Samuel experienced Kindergarten with when they were five. We’ve been camping with Lillia, numerous times, been bushwalking, been to her house, and her and I have a long friendship. Lillia visited me when Lily was only three days old!
Because of this, I thought the transition would be easy for Lily. I boldly stated on a friend’s FB page that I would not be missing Lily this week, partly because she is so full of life force and energy that she has seemed ready for full time school for the last two years!
I should know by now the folly of making grand statements, like when I was nineteen and declared that I was NEVER having children. This week I have well and truly had to eat my words. The first goodbye was a little prolonged, but OK. By Wednesday morning she was clutching me as I tried to quietly extricate myself from the class (which had already begun the morning circle), whilst holding the baby and trying to keep Zara with me. Lily ended up in tears, as did I. It was heart-wrenching for me, and I didn’t expect that it would be, being my third child and all.
Lily loves school, I know she does. It is just the moment of ‘goodbye’ that is tricky for her. She is outwardly confident but has a secret sensitive side. I often think to myself that Motherhood is just a series of letting go, beginning when I have to ‘let go’ on every level to let the baby emerge from my womb into the world. This week was another letting go, as I feel she is old enough to have a little wobble at school without me and then work it out herself, with the teacher’s loving support (part of the reason why I love our school).
Our other big Beginning was Ballet. Ever since Lily could walk, she has danced. We have a book about Angelina Ballerina, where she dances so much, and is so preoccupied with dancing, that her parents eventually send her to lessons, so she has an outlet. That’s a little bit how it feels with Lily. It’s satisfying to match the interest and motivation with the right timing.
We have resisted after-school activities for a long time, partly due to cost, partly due to wanting to be a bit free. This year, however, it feels right to get out there! She’s had two lessons and loves it.
I’m not a particularly ‘girly’ girl, so having a daughter who is very much that way is a little challenging. But I also love what that brings into my life. Lily, in particular, is the happiest, most positive person I know. She absolutely loves herself and is never down for long – qualities I would like to nurture within myself.